Dying to be thin

What I see in a mirror

Thu, 12 Apr 2012 08:00:20 -0400

So apart from the obvious I hate every single thing about my body. I remember breaking down when someone said to me name 3 things you like about your body it was like someone said to me “kill everyone and anything that meant something to you”. Where I have an OCD I over think things way to much for example you know that Dettol advert where they zoom up on the surfaces and its like millions of germs crawling around well I see things like that day to day but when it comes to my body I don’t know if I have just watched way to many programmes about people getting liposuction but with my body I see like yellow fat just there hanging on me. This in itself is motivation for me to get skinny so I don’t have that anymore it literally terrifies the life out of me. Anyway bit of a random post xxx

What I'm loving right now!

Thu, 05 Apr 2012 08:52:46 -0400

So summer is nearly here with the exception of the past few days it has been really hot so I found these great frozen fruit in my local supermarket and I am obsessed. I go through 1 packet of these a day (and that’s all I eat). I don’t wait for them to defrost I just eat them straight from the freezer and it takes me a good few hours to eat and really fills me up. And as you all know the colder things are the harder your metabolism works so that’s an extra bonus. I really recommend these.

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Fri, 16 Mar 2012 11:31:06 -0400

1000reasonstoloseweight: 1000 Reasons to Lose...

Fri, 16 Mar 2012 10:57:34 -0400

1000reasonstoloseweight:

1000 Reasons to Lose Weight: http://makeyouproud.tumblr.com/

1000reasonstoloseweight: 1000 Reasons to Lose Weight

Fri, 16 Mar 2012 10:57:29 -0400

1000reasonstoloseweight:

1000 Reasons to Lose Weight

This is a picture of me when I was 18 at one of my lighter days...

Fri, 16 Mar 2012 10:47:00 -0400

This is a picture of me when I was 18 at one of my lighter days before I turned into a fat fuck again :( but yeah my arms were really big still in this picture but I just loved that I was wearing a size UK 4 and the skirt still was really big for me :)

ABC Diet

Fri, 16 Mar 2012 09:54:56 -0400

I wasn’t around yesterday to post but for day 4 of my diet I just didn’t eat I was supposed to of had I think something like 400 calories but I was at work and I have never eaten at work. The reason for this is I have a phobia of eating in public I haven’t done it for about 5 years. I just hate people watching me eat I know what there thinking “she’s so fat she really needs to put down the fork!.” Today (day 5) I am at work again and then off to the gym for my personal training session and then by the time I get home I don’t think I will eat for the sheer reason I hate going to bed on a full stomach it just makes me feel so depressed for the whole weekend.

I know I am not really sticking to the calorie amounts that it has said but I am sure that as long as I don’t go over what they tell me then it’s fine and what’s the point if I am only going to be eating at like 10 o’clock at night it’s just going to sit on my stomach and I will never loose weight.

ABC Diet

Wed, 14 Mar 2012 11:04:01 -0400

Day 3 of the diet where today I am only allowed 300 calories and I am just having my last meal of the day which is 14 calories of celery and 2 baby tomatoes and 80g of tuna in spring water which. I also had half of a galia melon for breakfast which is 108 so I am just under the 300 mark but I don’t think I will bother with anything else today so see you on day 4!! xxx